by Alan Kent - 0 Reviews - 7 List
So last night you had a few too many local beers, sustainable distilled spirits, and none of our tasty local water? Now that the cold gray light of morning has hit, you'll need to consult our list of hangover helpers--a list of the best brunch spots and more in Portland to forget what happened last night. (Photo: Brunch at Petit Provence by Flickr user CommandZed.)
Updated: October 13, 2011
You don't have to tell your own mother that you're hungover--just go to Mother's (opening at 7am Tuesday through Friday and 9am Saturday and Sunday) and avoid the browbeating you'd get at home. The stuffed frittata is just what you need: bacon, eggs, cheddar cheese, potatoes, onions, and sour cream. Grab your very own French Press for a DIY coffee experience, or enjoy the fresh-squeezed juices (and booze) from the bar.
Extremely hangover-friendly, Genie's offers pro-level hair of the dog: Try the Emergen-C Elixir, which combines vodka, fresh citrus, and a megadose of Vitamin C for under $7. If that's too spendy, the $3 "Montana Breakfast" is just PBR and tomato juice. Brunch options go beyond the standard scrambled fare and include burgers with local beef--the grease will soothe your pounding head.
Grab Stumptown coffee and a $3-ish bagel at Kettleman's, then keep going back to the counter for more. Arrive early to grab a bag of day-old bagels at a steep discount. Add a smoked salmon schmear or one of the dozen-plus cream cheese flavors, and you're in for a solid start to what would otherwise be a rough day.
Open starting at 9am on weekends and 11am on weekdays, Float On provides sensory deprivation tanks--so you can go float in blissful gravity-free silence. Your skin will thank you (the water is filled with epsom salt), and if you're lucky you'll have a minor out-of-body experience. Try the Ocean Rooms if the idea of climbing into a Fringe-style space pod freaks you out.
So you partied downtown, you crashed downtown, and you've got some bucks to spare; you'll want to brunch downtown and enjoy the high-end fare at VQ. While the menu changes seasonally, there's always a broad selection of egg dishes as well as greasy (in the finest sense of the word) sandwiches. Grab a spot in the glass-walled dining room--on overcast Portland mornings, it's just the right amount of light to calm your poor hungover soul.
If you like to drown your troubles in fresh salsa, Autentica is the place to go. Get a big side of guacamole, the best huevos rancheros in town, and enjoy the quiet, uncrowded atmosphere. Beware: This brunch is weekend-only, and the fun starts at 10am. Then again, you probably just woke up at 10am.
So you're CURRENTLY INEBRIATED and need a place to eat a greasy steak, breakfast, or sandwich at 4am? The Original is one of Portland's very few 24-hour options--head on down for a greasy-spoon experience on SE Powell near the Aladdin Theater. You can get breakfast for dinner, dinner for breakfast, or whatever you want--as long as what you want is basic, greasy-spoon diner food.